Monthly Archives: October 2011

Simplicity in Abundance anyone?

Posted by baobrien in Christian Thought, Just for Fun!, Simple Living

Organized Simplicity by Tsh Oxenreider

As Brandon and I struggle to maintain 6 jobs between the two of us, prepare for our child and try to keep the romance alive… simplicity is something that we crave. In fact, lately I have found myself picking up every book I can that talks about this topic. Now, I realize the irony of adding a new thing to do in order to simplify more… but I’m just craving insight in cutting out the unnecessary and living life more intentionally.

One of my favorite books is Organized Simplicity. If you have time, or even if your time is significantly limited, you should definitely pick it up. It’s an easy read and gives practical advice for simplifying everything in your life. I read it in 10 minute spurts while nannying and LOVED it!

But that’s not why I’m writing today. One of the benefits of having a husband in publishing is that he often gets free books. By often I mean 3-5 a week at times! He reviews those he thinks the magazine would like and then passes on the rest to friends in ministry… or me!

So, as I try to blog more often I’m realizing that I need some prompts. So I thought Mondays would be a great day to blog about books that I’m reading. A cyber book Club of sorts.

Abundant Simplicity: Discovering the Unhurried Rhythms of Grace

 

And what’s my choice for this first series? Abundant Simplicity: Discovering the Unhurried Rhythms of Grace by Jan Johnson.

Simplicity. I’m longing for simplicity and I can’t wait to see what Jan has to say! Join me!

Fridays are for Favorites: Chicken Edition

Posted by baobrien in Just for Fun!

I love chicken. I mean, I absolutely love chicken. And I come by it honestly. You see in the Packer family when chicken is served nobody opts first for the white meat… No, we’re dark meat all the way. We. love. meat. Especially wings.

And fortunately for me, guess what’s on the agenda tonight…Chicken wings and baseball. It’s true that Brandon and I are on opposite sides of the fence in this particular game (He’s Cards all the way)… but we both agree on chicken wings. And what’s our wing of choice? Rosatis… they’re awesome. Try them.

And so concludes this second edition of “Fridays are for Favorites.” If you ever want to make this girl happy, just buy her some hot wings. Seriously. She’ll be your best friend.

Happy Weekend.

When words fail me….

Posted by baobrien in Uncategorized

…. there’s always His. Be encouraged by this today, friends.

18 I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. 19 For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. 20 For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope 21 that[h] the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.

22 We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. 23 Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. 24 For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? 25 But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

26 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 27 And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[i] have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

Romans 8:18-30

What are your thoughts?

A is for Adoption and Y is for You

Posted by baobrien in Adoption

It’s been more than a year since we began our adoption journey…. 17 mo to be exact. This is us when we began this journey, in fact this picture was taken just before our second homestudy interview. Can you see the joy in our faces? We were (and are) so excited. (Oh, and my hair was different… over the past 17 months it has gotten longer and then much, much shorter!)

We are often asked why we are adopting. It is true that becoming pregnant may not be a possibility for us. However, that’s not exactly why we are adopting… because adoption has been tugging on our hearts long before we knew we would face infertility. We like to say that it’s not Plan B… it’s just Plan A in a different order. 🙂

Okay, so what do adoption and you have in common?

When we started this process summer of 2010, we asked our friends and family at that time to join around us in prayer, with finances and by spreading the word!

Well today I’d like to come to you again to ask for your assistance. We have been so amazed at the prayer of those around us… so, so blessed. But we’d like to remind you of the “spreading the word” part. A lot of our friends and family have connections that we know about… and we have tried to talk to those people explicitly… but many of you may have connections that we don’t know anything about… so we’d like to ask you to keep us in mind.

And for your reference, here is our online profile http://www.pregsupport.org/Profiles/bran-amy.htm.

Finally, here we are today as we wait for our sweet BabyO… wherever he or she may be! 🙂

Fridays are for favorites…

Posted by baobrien in Favorites, Just for Fun!

… at least that’s what I’m planning on.

I’m not a very “gimmicky” person, but I thought it would be fun to begin posting about some of my favorite / favourite things on Fridays. Why Fridays? Well because Favorite and Friday both start with F, silly!

So what’s it today? Well lately I’ve discovered a few beauty tricks that I love, love, love and recipes that I might love even more (it’s probably a toss-up)…

Favorite # 1.  A few months ago a friend pointed me to a blog talking about oil cleansing. “Oil?” you may ask. Yes, oil. And for your face, no less. So I took a look here. And then I went out and bought some castor oil (at Whole Foods or any health food store… or online…very, very, very affordable).  And I watched with amazement that night at how the oil took off my make-up, gave me a healthy glow and was just. plan. awesome. The next day I just splashed my face with cold water and was good to go. Now, I was admittedly nervous about putting make-up on the next day, but it went SO WELL under my make-up, just like a high quality moisturizer. And I like the way my face looks so much, I’ve started wearing no make-up more often, and less make-up all the rest of the time! Try, try, try.

Favorite # 2.  I love to bake. And one of my favorite times of the year happens when cranberries appear back on the shelves. And when I buy said cranberries I have to make a Nantucket Cranberry Pie. Check it out here. It’s easy, it’s awesome, it works really well gluten-free… and you need to have it! Seriously, go buy cranberries and make it tonight! Seriously…

That’s all for me today. But before I sign off I would like for everyone to stop and cheer. Why? After a fairly long sabbatical, I have now posted 3 times (that’s right 3 times) in one week!

Yay, Me!!

Beautiful Things

Posted by baobrien in Adoption, Christian Thought, Spiritual Formation

On Monday I posted some very personal things (you can see post here!). I felt compelled to write what I did but I honestly didn’t expect the response I received. Sure I expected a few comments here and there (namely from our moms… and a few close friends), but the magnitude of messages I received both privately and publicly on facebook and through my blog was overwhelming. Thank you, dear friends, for your care for us.

Over the past 4 years Brandon and I have heard a variety of responses to our struggle first with infertility and then during our wait for an adoption. Some have bordered on awkward as individuals gave all too detailed advice to aid us in our quest. 😉 Some unintentionally disregarded our reality with comments like, “Don’t worry, God’s plan is better in the end,” or “Aren’t you glad you haven’t miscarried,” or even “You’re young, don’t worry about it.”

But most of you, the vast majority of you, have come around us to cry and to grieve and to call us forward. In the midst of our most painful moments, I, we, have been blessed with friends who have met us in our suffering and then pointed us forward. Not by denying our grief or our pain, but by exalting God.

During one of our recent dissappointments I let some individuals close to us know that it had not worked out. The responses I got were amazing. These individuals started by acknowledging how hard this was… what a great dissappointment it truly was. They shared their own dissappointment, shed their own tears….

And then they simply said, “But remember, God is good.” They didn’t make claims to know God’s plan, nor did they trivilize this dissappointment by asserting that God’s plan would be better in the end and we just needed to remember that.

No, they simply pointed me, pointed us, to our Savior.

And this gave me hope. This gave Brandon hope. This gave us an ability to move forward.

And we are so thankful.

One of the realities we have as Christians is that God is most evident in times of grief or pain. His joy is present even with our smile has disappeared. We have reason to rejoice, even when circumstances havn’t gone our way. And this is where my hope is found. You see I don’t often take hope is God’s future plan… I take hope in my present reality… with Christ all things, I mean all things, are possible. He is my hope even when life is hard. He is my joy in the midst of my tears.

By his power, and only by his power, I can see beauty in the midst of my grief. Friends, I haven’t lost my joy. I have just found it in new ways.

And you are a huge part of that.

I wanted to close today with a song that has been increasingly meaningful to me in the last week and that (spoiler alert) Brandon and I will be singing next month!

Breaking my silence

Posted by baobrien in Adoption, Christian Thought

I haven’t been blogging lately. And that’s a significant understatement… because it has been since July that I posted anything.

And I’m going ot jump back in today… but I would be lying if I said it was easy. You see, I haven’t been blogging because I haven’t felt capable… or like I had anything at all to say. These past few months have been some of the hardest of our life. And I’ve wanted to hold these painful events close. I’ve shared them with family and very close friends… but the idea of sharing with people beyond that tight circle has been unimaginable.

But I think it’s time. I don’t know why, I just feel like I should probably share.

At the beginning of the month of August we found out (for the third time in our adoption journey) that a possible situation was no longer possible. It wasn’t a situation we had placed all of our hope in, but anytime a potential birth mom situation is no longer possible, it hurts.

We were finishing up a vacation with my family when we received this news. The day after we returned to Wheaton, we had the one-year update of our homestudy. When our caseworker was in our home, we found out that they were having a slow down in the number of adoption cases. No slow down in the crisis pregnancy situations they work with, but none of them were choosing adoption.

Another blow.

And I found myself fighting to stay afloat. Activities and events that in the past had been energizing now brought me to tears. Meetings that I could do in my sleep were requiring great effort.

And this was August. One of the biggest months for any Children’s Minister is August and I couldn’t afford to slow down. But I just couldn’t do it.

And then one night we got a phone call from a family member about a possible situation in AR. Within a few days we had made contact with a birthmom who was 7 months along. She and I spoke all day long, and it began to feel like everything was happening. During the course of that week I mailed our profile book to her, we talked about a possible time for us to come visit. We maintained constant contact. And then Friday morning she contacted me and told me she had chosen another family.

By that point Brandon and I had been praying for her for a week and we had sincerely been praying that whatever decision she made, she would feel a peace. We knew there were other families and we had sincerely been praying for them.

But this was still painful. Because unlike the 3 situations beforehand, this one was personal. This birthmom had a name and a face.

So we took time to grieve and tried to think through possible decisions that needed to be made. And as we were praying through these over the next week we learned that Brandon’s grandmother had died. We made the trip to be with family and had a life-giving and wonderful time with the O’Brien side. Diane O’Brien was an amazing woman who we admired and loved deeply. And she loved Jesus. I mean SHE. LOVED. JESUS. It was a beautiful testimony. We felt loved and supported and we rejoiced in her life. But not without sadness. You see Grandma had been praying for our child fervently and we had so hoped to place our sweet BabyO in her arms.

So we returned home and began to live life. We struggled and felt this struggle in every area, but we also felt God’s grace through the support of those around us.

Earlier this month we were contacted about a little boy from an agency we have listed with in Texas. This was a boy who had already been born and needed a home. We put our names in to be considered. (In this situation the agency would be making the call.) We sincerely felt a peace about it, but the problem was the placement fee in this situation was significantly above our previously planned-for amount. Significantly above. Several days after we had put our name in, we had to withdraw purely for financial reasons.

And I felt knocked out. I knew how it felt to not be chosen. We had experienced that, and I had prepared myself for it. But I had not prepared myself for the pain it would cause to walk away from a situation. I was heart broken. I found myself incapable of doing life.

And we were amazed at the support that came around us. Friends and family who prayed with us and for us. God protected us from platitudes (you know like “Don’t worry, it will be fine.” or “God has a great child for you, just wait.”) These statements may be true but they are never helpful when a painful situation happens.

Instead God provided for us a community that grieved with us… expressed their own frustration at these events… and crowded around us with support. Friends brought us dinner, one good friend expressed her own frustration that this had been our journey, volunteers covered for me to be able to take a break one Sunday. Encouragement and hope flooded our inboxes. Sweet cards came in the mail. These events were tangible expressions of God’s grace that we desperately needed. We felt like healing was possible.

And we are learning to move forward.

Before I conclude this very long post, I want to say something about the man who I have the great privilege of living life with… Brandon O’Brien. As I have struggled, he has sacrificed to care for me. When I broke down and felt incapable of doing life, he picked me up and together we have walked forward. The journey that we’re on can be a death sentence for any marriage… but I am blessed with a man and with a partnership that is life-giving.

As I weep to write this post, I also rejoice in God’s rich grace. In his beautiful faithfulness. Today I am just okay, but I am confident that one day I will find myself on the other side.